Been thinking about Mom

Alot lately.

She lives in my basement. I like her there.
Our relationship is so much more than just mother/daughter. She is my best friend. Truly the best person I know.
I would call her by her first name, after all, she calls me "Nik" not 'daughter', but we tried it once, and it was weird. So I call my best friend Mom.

I've been thinking some rather selfish thoughts of her lately. I want her to stay. She got a good job, she's making money again, and I assume that someday she will consider moving into her own home. Here's the selfish part: I don't want her to go. Ever.

For the past 2 years, hell the past 5, ever since the deployments started, she's been here helping me. She and I have been close ever since I started having kids (don't ask about our relationship BEFORE that, it wasn't always pretty) But when she moved in here, it felt like she became part of MY family, instead of me being a part of hers. If she left, I would feel like I lost a part of my family.

She has lost several members of her family in the past 5 years, in fact, the majority of them within a just under 2 year period. Her sister Diane is all she's got left of 'her' family. But she is a part of mine. She is a very important part of my family. She kept me sane when my husband had to leave, she was a shoulder to cry on more times than I can count. She made me laugh when I wanted to cry... often. She let me cry when I really needed to.

I feel like I am a better person when she is there to keep me grounded in what's important, she reminds me of what REALLY matters, what's real and really meaningful.

I want her to stay.