Murphy's LUNCH

I know he's got that law, "anything that can go wrong, WILL" But today I had Murphy's LUNCH. I go home for lunch every day, I only live 5 blocks from work. I get the mail. let the dogs out to potty, whatever.

When I left the building today, it had been snowing, so I had to scrape my windows before I could drive. I got all the way around, and when I got to the back window I noticed that the wiper was all gunked up so I lifted it up to snap it down, thus knocking all the slush and crud off. PINCHED MY THUMB! And I have to bowl tonight! It's gonna swell...I whine and whimper a bit, and head for home.

I popped my leftover rice hot dish in the microwave and ran downstairs to the fridge to grab a Diet Pepsi. I got settled in at the dining room table with my lunch. Everything was going fine, and as I finished my little dish of hot dish I remembered that I had bought a big bag of apples over the weekend. I jumped up and went rifling through the drawer for my handy-dandy little apple cutter, cores the thing and quarters it for me! I get my apple cut up and head back to the table to munch. SPILL MY POP! All over the chair and floor... I get up again, grab the roll of paper towels, and clean up my mess.

Finally I get to sit down and eat my apple. Being good. Eating healthy, right? I damn near choked to death on a piece of apple! Got that coughing that makes your entire ribcage feel like it's going to explode... can't get air, eyes watering (the ONE day I decide to wear eye make-up, OF COURSE!) and turning bloodshot. Not pretty. When I finally hacked up the offending piece of fruit, I threw the rest in the garbage. To hell with it.

My thumb hurts, my soda is spilled and my healthy lunch tried to kill me.
How's YOUR day?